In which Chandrachoodan is ready to be married off
I made Lemon rice for lunch today. Three or so days ago, it was Carrot saadham and Velirikkai pachadi. I have already shown you how I make soup and stuff, and can whip out a good Rasam any day. I cannot sing, but appreciate good music. I am calm, humble, and homely.
In other words, I am the perfect middle-class housewife material. All prospective grooms, pliss to come ponnu paathufy.
On the other hand, to take this post firmly into androgynous waters, I am a Real Man TM. I ironed my own shirt for the first time since coming to Bristol. (Because till y’day, I didn’t posses an iron, and academia doesn’t appreciate knife-edged creases on your shirts as much as they look for it in your 5000 word essay.) But coming back to the point, I ironed my own shirt, and a few trousers and a boxer, all alone in true RealMan fashion.
That gives me three career paths to explore if the aforementioned 5000 word essay (and its brothers and uncles and bastard sons) all go up in flames. Housewife. Small time cook. Roadside isthiri man.
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December 13th, 2009 at 10:04 pm
he he he…
im also in the same boat!!
Especially in the IRON stuff!!
Goodluck to both of us!!
December 13th, 2009 at 11:27 pm
Brilliantness post CC. Excellent occupations to choose from da
December 13th, 2009 at 11:48 pm
Cmon CC… you just can’t put Housewife and Small time cook together…
Btw, time to get married… Shall i ask some nice Paiyan (in this case a ponnu who is tomboyish in all sense) to see you out !!
December 13th, 2009 at 11:48 pm
you can’t sing? instant DQ!
December 13th, 2009 at 11:54 pm
Aditya: At least, not in any form you’d recognize as songs/singing.
December 13th, 2009 at 11:56 pm
Bharat: Please read tags. The first one especially. Read it again. READ IT AGAIN. And then read it again once more.
December 14th, 2009 at 4:02 pm
CC:
Sometimes it is good to choose to not read or not notice tags at all !!
That way it brings some intentional fun with the comments.
December 14th, 2009 at 5:48 pm
From:Agmark board
Re: Your application for Perfect Wife Material TM 5.0
You need to demonstrate proficiency in the following to be considered certifiable:
1. Folding clothes
2. Being able to polish vessels in armpit-deep kitchen sink in 15 minutes before aforementioned activity
3. Feeding human offspring who cries and shits. Pauses. Then shits and cries.
4. Being tall,fair, and comely bride who can cook both pasta (garlic free) and mysore pak*
(* 1 to 3 considered null and void if 4 is not met)
December 14th, 2009 at 5:57 pm
Sruthi:
>>>You need to demonstrate proficiency in the following to be considered certifiable:
1. Folding clothes< <<
I iron my shirts. And boxers. OF COURSE I can fold them.
>>>2. Being able to polish vessels in armpit-deep kitchen sink in 15 minutes before aforementioned activity< <<
Unfortunately, the fallout of being 6 feet 1 tall is no kitchen sink is armpit deep. But I can and do polish vessels. On a daily basis.
>>>3. Feeding human offspring who cries and shits. Pauses. Then shits and cries.< <<
No human offspring in vicinity. But I’ve supported and carried drunk humans across space-time continuum. I think that qualifies.
>>>4. Being tall,fair, and comely bride who can cook both pasta (garlic free) and mysore pak*
(* 1 to 3 considered null and void if 4 is not met)< <<
#Tall. Refer Point 2.
#Fair. I am fair and just and balanced in opinion. South Indian boy/girl. Therefore skin is not to be considered.
#Garlic-free pasta. Check.
#Mysore Pak- can I get a relaxation on this rule alone? Please? Pretty please?
December 14th, 2009 at 6:04 pm
From: Flustered Agmark board
Re: Re: Your application for Perfect Wife Material TM 5.0
Dear Ho-hum,
1. Ironing does not act as a pre-qualification to folding clothes. In fact, ironing follows destruction of carefully measured tucks to ensure symmetry and harmony are maintained in clothesdom. Hence, move to ask for futher evidence of claim.
2. Does vessels include oiled biggu vessel with urala kazhangu stubborn hangovers?
3. Erm. Tall humans who emit after methanol consumption are not considered suitable companions for tall, fair, and comely bride who can cook both pasta (garlic free) and mysore pak
4. Substitute mysore pak with jaangiri. Read jaangiri, not jalebi.
Please submit your answers in triplicat
December 14th, 2009 at 6:05 pm
*triplicate
December 15th, 2009 at 3:13 am
You iron your boxers? Heh
December 21st, 2009 at 10:23 pm
FedEX THAT SHIZZ!
December 29th, 2009 at 5:06 am
Deadly post, C—Chuckled so much hot tea has just been choked on and gargled involuntarily.
wipes eyes
The ladies dunno what they be missin’.