Selective Amnesia

Maami coins word. Vetti Dreams.

The Maami, I tell you, is the most brilliant creature to ever inhabit the online world. What follows is proof.

me: Yello
Resident Maami (RM): yello saar!
me: Maami orre bijya?
RM: summa pretending daan
classes, readings etc
me: oho.
RM: neenga eppdi?
me: good good. working.
RM: orre dubai aa?
me: in between doing flickr and all.
RM: or back in madras aa?
me: no more dubai no.
back in Madras.
RM: oh ho
i thought you were going back to dubai
me: I am not.
RM: doo-baay doo!
yay!
good for you
RM: yeah yeah
RM: love the flickring btw
me: dubai majorly depressing.
RM: you should charge for conducting photo walks
me: I might.
RM: pinna!
you offshore secretarial work to me and give me commission
me: but then, somebody will come along and do one free photowalk and all gumbal will go there.
oh. nice.
RM: well the edge is in information no?
me: will do that
yes. that is true.
RM: and you can bribe all officials and get to the best of places
me: but till I build one core group – I do podhu makkal sevai

bribe sounds good
good. very good.
RM: hahaha
come to for nefarious ideas
me:
coming this side sometime?
we will hold on photowalk in your honour.
RM: ippodikki no plans pa
school till august
and god knows what after that
me: oh!
yeah
RM: i just keep myself happy with Tam films in the meanwhile
i wish there was one film that was really based in Madras
all these bloody madurai films piss me off
me:
Chennai 28 not happening?
RM: Well – it was interesting
me: Mozhi and C 28 - very urban, madras films
RM: but the complete lack of female characters makes empathizing very hard
mozhi i liked
me: but yeah, all these villagu subjectsu make me puke
RM: C 28 - after a while it was annoying
me: hmmm
RM: i cannot stand these simple baay in rural TN going to Madurai – meeting local goons and saving girlfriend from rape stories anymore
mudilai
me: veyyil!
paruthi veeran!!
ugh!!
RM: exactly!
yuckkkk
i like urban violence
me: lol
RM: and it’s not the bombay underworld kinds
me: that’s fantastic
there’s a story there.
urban violence
RM: i like chase sequences in abandoned dockyards
and inside old govt buildings
me: maybe I will do my saravana bhavan thaatha short story as film
RM: I can’t remember the last time someone showed Marina on film
it’s a pity
me: true
RM: Why don’t Tamil films explore Madras at all
if at all – they invent some fake vaishnavi arts college
there’s a real Stella Maris boys!
that is fodder!
me: we shall do one film.
RM: ess please
me: only madras.
RM: i saw kannamoochi enneda
but it was more KL than Madras
me: I heard one major kodumai that film
RM: i like sathyaraj
me: haven’t seen it though.
RM: but that bloody hero with his mallu accent
annoyed the fuck out of me
me:
RM: seriously
the hero and heroine couldnt’ speak tam
the heroine kept doing the konjal tamil talk
which is sooooo annoying
after the age of six
me: rotfl
it is not even funny at 6
it is mildly off-putting, but can be excused for age.
RM: well – at six you can excuse it for slowlearning or something
after that – it gets blood boiling
me:
RM: the word is for instance “yenne pannarai” NOT “enne panree”
me: fake iyer/palaghat accent gets my goat. and other domesticated animals
RM: oh yessss!
yenne pannaraaaai
or the one most annoying thing
fake brahmin accent = namely, substitute all “sh” with “ch”
chaadam
chevuru ku paint
me: cheri
for seri
ugliest word. cheri.
RM: EXACTLY
what the fuck is cheri? short for chicory?
me: brings some very bloody images.
RM: or tamil Cherry fruit
me: yeah.
RM: cheri cheri, chaadam podungo
chamattu ponnu
me: these people, i tell you. All Kodambakkam folks have to be shot.
RM: absolutely
naan chonnen illiya!
me: lol
that is bad.
and, ambi.
yeanda ambi, enna panrai
RM: ESSS
amni and ammalam
me: ambi needs to be patented and copyrighted and put behind 12inch thick safe to be protected from Kbakkam
RM: and no woman should be named Janaki
me: poor Crazy Mohan
will go out of business then.
RM: i lurve only SV Sekhar
he knew the nuance of Brahmin comedy
me: hmm
RM: one thing is for sure – there are no patriarchs in Brahmins
me: crazy did too, before he became the all-in-all alaguraja of script
RM: women rule
me: maami raajyam only.
RM: anybody who doesn’t realize that cannot make a Brahmin comedy
me: maamas like to watch times now or NDTV. and pontificate about sonia gandhi or karunanidhi
RM: lol
me: pretty harmless otherwise.
RM: sigh
what will happen to maamis fifty years from now?
i worry – that they might go extinct
me: they will be in seattle or chicago
they will never become extinct.
RM: appdeenu sollarai
seri daan
me: too many generations, too much evolutionary support
RM: but mylapore tank should go nudist
me: ROTFL
Imagining what will happen
RM: Madisaar Burning Maamis Association
MBMA
me: maada streets market selling bikinis and suntan lotion
RM: it’s like the MBA degree – only more coveted
me: rotfl
RM: you are taught to burn maximum madisaars by causing maximum environmental damage
with correct technique
and the subtle art of burning madi madisaars
me: throw a little veratti into the fire.
RM: turning madisaar to mini-saar
me:
RM: how to make table cloths out of madisaar
the economics of madisaar transformation
me: Madisaaronomics
RM: ROTFL
ezudalaam chandroo
soooper success
me: the New York Times Best Seller.
RM: Madinomics
me: or, the New Mylapore Times Best Seller
madinomics
RM: Madinomics: Finding the Madi in all things around us – the new best seller from Brahmins on uncovering the madissar’s potential to change our world
me: ROTFL
there is immense potential here.
RM: i think you should blog this
me: this is brilliant!
straight from google chat to wordpress
RM: Madinomics and Vettinomics
the Tamil art of Vetti: Uncovering the strength of idle wordship
me: that last word.
respect.
RM: Danks!
me: idle wordship!
w00t only
I bow! I bow!
RM: Naanga ellam Ide Worshippers aakum
Vetti Vizha: The festival for Idle Worship
me: hahaha
vetti vel, veera vel
RM: lol

Veni, Vidi, Vetti
me: :D
vetti kodi kattu
ok. that wasn’t so hot.
RM: lol
Veshti to Vetti: Tracing Tamil Manhood from Clothing to Career
me: nice.
RM: ayyo!
me: ?
RM: generally

Vettisaami
me: T Rajendar as the villager turned city boy.
RM: Wetti: Art of idle swimming
me: vettisaami
RM: ahaaa!
me: vettinery – the science of being vetti
RM: Vettinaadu and Vaayanaadu: Differential economics of two cultural regions
me:
RM: Vetti Petti: Contender to Visu’s talk show – same concept – more Vetti
me: that is not pojjible. already that talk is very vetti.
RM: Vetti: How the Italians stole Vetti and sold Gucci
me: if it got any vetti, it will never run.
RM: Vetti Dreams: The fantasies of Tamil Manhood
Vettisaurus: The Ancient Tamil Prehistoric creature
me: Vetti Dreams! w00t!
Blogging it only for this.
Vetti dreams
RM: :))
me: vetti madichi kattu. the art of bottling up one’s vetti fantasies

RM: pattu vetti : Ancient art of tying Kancheevaram
me:
RM: VettiMan: Archetypal Tamil Man
me: Vettinadu
where vetti is a caste
RM: Vettiran: An old Tamil Man – Veteran Vetti
me: and a badge of honour
:D
RM:
me: vettayadu, vettiadu
RM: LOL
rotfl
Vettiadu: Tamil form of Kabbadi
me: Also, vetti+aadu
the futile goat.
RM: Vetti-kket: Tamil infallible wicket
me: vettinatyam
RM: ROTFL
me: one nimit. i getting vetti phone call
RM: Vettiquette: Art of sitting and drinking coffee
vokay
Vettimology: What we are doing now – Tamil Art of discovering words
btw: for after you finish call – vetti was originally term for forced labour – bonded labour sorts – which is why no velai vetti
me: still on call, but that is sooper funda