Selective Amnesia

Why the cartellians are wrong

Folks. I admit it. My fellow cartellians are all wrong. I was too, till recently. But one incident opened my eyes up. And I realised the folly of my ways. I eat humble pie (since I am on a diet and all, I shall eat only one portion, though) and hang my head in shame.

MY FELLOW CARTELLIANS ARE ALL WRONG. There, I said it. Though I won’t live to see the coming Independence day of this great country (After this post, the Cartel’s high council would have met and discussed what to do – I think Madman’s knives will finally pay off its investment), I am proud I have bared all.

Here’s where the cartellians have gone wrong: Logic.
You see, being the super-gods and extra-terrestrial intelligent beings of light they are, they don’t understand, barely comprehend even, that humans don’t get logic. Oh no!
To a human being, Logic is as alien as the cartellians themselves. Or a more fitting analogy, logic is to humans what 42 is to Nilu.But the cartellians, not knowing this, censure the humans, who more deserve pity.

As the Cartellians go through this blogosphere, trying to make reasoned comments and logical repartees and structured thoughts, they are looked upon by the other side in abject terror. And as fear makes the adrenaline boil and adrenaline makes the humans act – and since they act in heat of the moment, they know not what they write.

Take my very close and good friend Shivam. What a human! His heart bleeds. His words sting. His actions speak. (I personally haven’t seen him act on his causes, but that’s my untrusting, suspicious Cartellian sense, really) But, much as I admire the boy, oops, man, I would be forced to admit that Logic is not his strongest point.

Take, purely to illustrate the idea, a post I made recently, about him goofing up on the difference between anonymous and pseudonym-ous (a word I just coined now. That’s why I am the best darn writer there ever was)

All this, dear reader, is just the preamble. Honest or not, I know not. But the point is,
If the cartellians aim to show the world of humans that their way is the right way (and I do think it is) they can do zilch with logic. To convert the humans to this side, they need to talk to them in the language they understand – gibberish.

For instance, when in an argument over, say, Government regulations on blogs, if the cartellians say “Free Speech cannot be subjective. Free speech, by its very nature, is for all.” and attempts, through logic to explain his point (sadly, much as we cartellians hate being sexist, there is not a single woman in the cartellian conclave. So, a cartellian will continue to be a he. Unless of course, one us discovers HRT), he will get no where towards convincing, heck – even making the other side comprehend his point.

But, if a cartellian were to try illogic (crude example: You moron! Free speech as in free-software, not free beer), you can be sure the cartellian would have made his point, loud and clear.

Which is why, I say, my fellow cartellians are on the wrong. They should liberally use illogic, till the human is converted. Once that is done, life will make sense for all.

I repeat – all logic to those illogical can only be illogic.